[Poruku]

I guess I'll take this opportunity to briefly share my thoughts on the general state of affairs

I think I resonate with Cereza the most, but for me I was a newplayer during the SL2 renaissance about 3 years ago, when G6 became a great environment and things were pretty great for a while. There were cliques, and plenty of bullshit and terrible things that happened to close friends of mine. But at least it was fun.

I don't know how much of a role Korvara played in the shift, but something changed drastically, and the game has slowly become less fun.

When korvara started, I wanted to be a leader. I didn't get it, but I got a high role and waited for my chance, which was certainly a mistake. And I realized only recently how much that desire for power rotted away a lot of enjoyment of the game for me. Power is something that corrupts. It is a great responsibility, and a difficult task, but it is also the object of envy. And when you are in power, people look up to you not just with envy, but also with great expectations, tainted with spite.


And at some point, I realized that the community was crumbling around me. From the top, from the bottom. People I love, getting banned, people I liked disliking each other openly. Every time something happens, it seems to become more complex. More strange and confusing. At this point, I feel like the community is unstable. Nobody really knows the full story, many people don't trust each other. People feel like they can't speak openly, and at the same time feel like they don't know enough. Everyone watching their backs or hiding pain. 

The things I said in my other post about the bans and the GMs is still true, but that's not even the problem anymore. There's a cancer of distrust and hate in this community, and I dearly miss happier days... I miss G6, and I even miss the early days of Korvara. Back then, people were just fucking around and playing a role and doing crazy shit and things just happened. But even back then you could see the cracks.

I don't really have a solution, I'm just sad and disappointed. I don't really enjoy the game anymore besides smaller scheduled rp with people I know. With characters that aren't involved in politics and conflict. Or with my antagonists who are just a villain for heroes to punch and to have a bit of pvp. Though even those are controversial sometimes, and that thought makes me incredibly sad.

It's just too hard, man. Korvara is so hard. You have to put in so much work to do anything, and you might not even get anything... And even if you succeed and achieve your goals, it might make other people unhappy with you, or worse.

I'll be honest, when I wasn't offered the role of Premier after Ella stepped down, I was really frustrated for a while, although I kept it inside. I think that's such a shame, I hate what I let this game do to me. I love Filia and Anhita but it got to my head. It made me not enjoy my main character. I can't imagine how many other people felt things similar to me. And perhaps acted on those feelings. And I think it's insane how much negativity this game has caused by virtue of being so inherently cutthroat. Where there is power, there is pain and envy.

I can't even imagine the pain Filia and Marci went through. It's only now that I truly realize the extent by which this community is shattered. I don't really have the solutions, I am just sad right now.

But I love you guys. I think we can figure it out, over time.